The war of the worlds

Have you ever had a day when you thought your kids were out to get you? I sure did today, on Father's day of all days.

The weather was beautiful, and I desperately wanted to go out for a walk - hike, a park, or a beach. But my kids didn't share my sentiment. They wanted to stay home and play basketball in the backyard all day. That's what they've been doing all week. But they don't just play. They play for 5 minutes, then start a fight accusing each other of cheating. They whine, they yell and they kick each other, then they find a solution and everything starts again.

I was not going to spend this beautiful sunny day at home breaking the fights again. I announced that we are going to the park whether they want to or not. That's when the whining started. I was the worst mother in the world because I was taking them to the park instead of letting them spend a day in the backyard. Afterall, it's summer, and every day is going to be sunny and warm, and I am staying home all day anyway, so I can go for a walk whenever I want.

I did not give up. I was hoping that when we get to the park, they will start playing and running, and will forget all about the backyard, and me and my husband will have a chance to rest and enjoy the sun. So I took a soccer ball and sun hats and made everybody get into the car.

The whining continued. I have to mention that my kids cannot take a car trip without annoying the wits out of each other. This trip was not an exception. I try to tune out the whining, the yelling, and the name calling, but it is not easy, and by the time we get to our destination usually steam comes out of my ears.

When we got to the park, I got the ball and toys out, found a good spot to lie in the sun, and let the kids run around and play. Not for long. They refused to play, reminding me that I was the worst mother in the world for making them play with each other - they needed one of us for company. Since it was Father's day, I volunteered. We went out for a walk around the park, found some rocks they could throw around, and sure enough, one of the rocks hit one of the heads. The crying started. Then, again, I was reminded that I was the worst mom in the world for taking them to the park.

We spent about an hour in the park until we realized that going to the park was not a good idea afterall. Maybe we should've considered the kids' desire to stay home instead of my desire to get outside. We got into the car and went to town for some ice cream, and that diffused the situation (until the ride home, which went as usual).

To say that my kids don't get along very well would be an understatement if you ever heard one. They cannot spend 5 minutes with each other without driving one another (and me) crazy. When they are together for more then 5 minutes and there is no fight, my heart melts and I run out to get a camera to remind myself later that peace does actually happen sometimes.

I try to explain to them how great it is to have a sibling, how lonely I was growing up without one, that when they grow up and we grow old they will be each other's best friend and support, but that does not resonate. The younger one does not understand that yet, and the older one is so mad at the younger one he refuses to understand.

I cannot believe in my wildest dreams that they will grow up hating each other. I know that it happens sometimes that siblings continue to hate each other even as they grow up. I just don't believe that this will happen in my family. Maybe I don't believe it because I consider having a sibling priceless growing up without one. I know (or pray) that this hating thing is a stage that they will outgrow. I only hope that they will outgrow it before they drive me crazy.